These Crisps Are Rank
Meh, Walker’s new crisps are available, as evidenced by the pan-media onslaught of Gary Lineker foisting spud-based sustenance at the general public 8 million times a second, even when you’re already eating them.
My submission of ‘Chicken and Egg’ flavour seems to have fallen by the wayside, so I’m off to the nearest competitor they haven’t consumed yet, along with the secret recipe I’ve been preparing in the rat and salmonella-festooned galley of the good ship Sandwiches Corner.
In the name of research I’m taking a few of these new flavours with me, and my preliminary findings are:
- Chilli and Chocolate - pretty awful. Start well enough, but the kind of thing that makes you want several glasses of water the nearer you get to the bottom of the bag. I put vinegar on them and they were a bit better.
- Cajun Squirrel – could be anything – Mexican Slipper, Ukrainian Sideboard, Martian Dirt – tastes like some cardboard dipped in a mystery bag of ‘exotic’ herbs and spices which are actually pavement-flakes collected from the paws of stray dogs
- Builder’s Breakfast – the worst thing I have ever tasted. A flavour so bad you wouldn’t even serve them to Hitler. Perhaps he invented them.
photo credit: waldopepper
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